Fair is Fair – Another Letter from Sheldon.

Written By: B.D. Butler - Aug• 02•12

Dear Dexter,

After I came in from the back yard, I was rather a tired from chewing on the large stick that I found, and dragging all over the grass.  I know you think that because I am a puppy that I am open all things new, and am fearless, however I think you are mistaken. I was just about to drift off, after I snuck up onto the couch, when you suddenly dove into your water bowl.  I was in the middle of counting dancing chewies and treats, when you decided to play Esther Williams in Million Dollar Mermaid, and it startled me.

What splashed me?

You and I have never had any problems, and that is one thing that makes you much different from that other bird in the cage across the room.  You know, your friend Cooper, the one that has nipped my nose, and tries to scare me on a daily basis.  I really thought you were different, however today with your cage olympics, I am starting to see you in a whole new light. 🙁

I was startled at first, and then amazed and extremely annoyed at all of the water you were flinging about.  It not only got on the floor, but the couch, and most importantly me.  Even though I am a water dog, and I am supposed to like water, I like it on my own terms.  I truly felt like you were being very inconsiderate of my nap time, and in the interest of modesty, you could have done it in private.

Bring It!

I also feel like there is a double standard between us dogs and you birds.  You and Cooper seem to get  to make noise, bathe in your water dish, and fling food all over.  Yet if we dogs tried that, there would be a scolding.  Not to mention I feel like we should have a bigger water dish, so we could have the option of taking a dip.  Granted they may have to go purchase a large horse trough, but I think fair is fair.  I am going to sit down and write a strongly worded letter to the owners.

I hope that the next time I decide to take a nap, you will be a little more considerate and respectful of my feeling, and my time.  Being a puppy is hard enough, and I shouldn’t have to deal with being scared of something that is a mere fraction of my size.

After watching the 1985 movie The Legend Of Billy Jean, starring Miss Helen Slater, I realized you have to stand up for what you believe in, and I shook my paw up in the ari with her in the tradition of fighting injustice!

Fair is Fair!



Please understand my point of view, and understand that I don’t want to have this conversation again.



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  1. Chad W. says:

    I really like your blog and writing. I am new to birds, I was given a conure by my girlfriend, and your blog has helped me with questions that I have had. Good job and thank you

  2. Becca S. says:

    This is a very cute post!! We love sheldin and parrot earth.

  3. Britta says:

    this is so great. I love it.

  4. […] bowls quite frequently during the day, but I also can leave a room, and they decide to go for a dive playing Esther Williams in Million Dollar Mermaid.  This being the case, I was taught that […]

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